Website That Will Ship Glitter To Your Enemies Goes Viral, Creator Begs Customers To Stop Buying And Looks To Sell
Haters of the world, rejoice! This is your time to shine. Not only can you pay someone to anonymously send a box of animal feces to your enemies, now you can also anonymously send them an envelope of the worst substance known to mankind: glitter.
Using the convenient new service Ship Your Enemies Glitter, you can literally ship your enemies glitter.
“Want to piss off someone you dislike for only $9.99? Let us send them some stupid fucking glitter that is guaranteed to go everywhere,” reads the site. The process is simple: Find a person that you hate. Provide Ship Your Enemies Glitter with their address, then pay $9.99AUD (that’s about $8.20). This masterful organization will then send this person an envelope containing “so much glitter… that they’ll be finding that shit everywhere for weeks.” They will also send your chosen target a note informing them that they’re awful.
Ship Your Enemies Glitter, based in Australia, promises total anonymity; you pay them through PayPal (which Ship Your Enemies Glitter recommends sending an envelope of glitter to as well, because why not?) and your name appears nowhere on the either the envelope or the note. It also promises maximum glitter dispersal, as the note will be folded up around the glitter, thereby creating a glitter explosion when it’s pulled out of the envelope.
Currently, Ship Your Enemies Glitter’s services have been suspended due to overwhelming demand. According to the organization’s website, they’re still working through back orders. The site’s founder, Mathew Carpenter, has begged people to stop sending asking for glitter.
Please stop buying this horrible glitter product — I’m sick of dealing with it,” he wrote on Product Hunt.
Ship Your Enemies Glitter might even be for sale already. After getting a million page views in only 24 hours, Carpenter posted a Tweet offering to sell. It remains to be seen if anyone will bite; until they do, you’ll just have to daydream about how satisfying it will be when that person that you hate opens an envelope and spews about a pound of microscopic glitter onto both their clothing and living space, creating a toxic glitter zone that will take literally years to clean up.