Why Buying Your Mate Fake Tits is a Good Investment

11/19/12 8:07AM EST

hotwomanincar Why Buying Your Mate Fake Tits is a Good InvestmentWhile sitting at the bar, waiting on a client I was meeting, I overheard another table talking about the bartender. The girl being referenced was smoking hot, and had the kind of body that is usually reserved for centerfolds. More than once, I had wondered to myself why a girl that pretty was working this kind of job. As I continued to wait, the conversation turned largely to her breasts. As these well-dressed business men, sitting one table over, wagered among themselves on whether or not they were real, I started thinking about whether or not fake tits could be a good investment.

Obviously, this chick wasn’t using her assets to their fullest potential, but I was damn sure that she was making at least one guy happy in the sack. What would someone pay for a night with her? What was her set of hooters worth from an investment standpoint? Alas, my client showed up and I was forced to focus my mind on more important topics…like real estate investments. Later, though, in the privacy of my own home, I returned to the train of thought.

Being a woman, I have often toyed with the idea of a breast enhancement. While I am not especially lacking in that department naturally, the thought of bigger, more perfectly shaped tits that never sag definitely has its advantages. But, a decent boob job runs about 10k, give or take a little. While this is a bit more than pocket change, it sure is a hell of a lot cheaper than the sports car sitting in a lot of men’s garages. If they are so quick and willing to drop nearly 100k for the privilege to play with that toy for a few years, buying their long-term girlfriend or lifetime mate fake tits should be a no-brainer, right?

hotwoman Why Buying Your Mate Fake Tits is a Good Investment

Best of all, this investment could be considered quite unselfish! I mean, think of the confidence that a man would be giving to his girl, and how happy she will be with her new body shape! Her clothes will fit nicer and she will have a great excuse to go shopping too! Plus, if a guy played it just right, he could give them as a Christmas or birthday gift and get just as much fun out of it as his woman does! Talk about the gift that keeps on giving!

But, before you run out and buy your flavor of the month a set of fake tits, keep in mind the expected length of the relationship. Don’t go and drop your change on someone who will just take the goods and go somewhere else…unless you really are into charity work.

The bottom line, though, is that the ROI on a good set of tits seems to be strong. regardless of who makes the investment. In fact, if you are a lady looking to land a Wall Street hot shot, a pair of fake tits might be the greatest 10k investment you’ve ever made. Just one trip to the south of France and you might have already been reimbursed!

[Images via Shutterstock]

 
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