7 Strangely Motivational Quotes From Adam Carolla

Image via Photo Works/Shutterstock

Adam Carolla is, depending on your sense of humor, a podcasting comedic genius, or a crass, argumentative loudmouth. I happen to be a fan, and am constantly amazed at how profound Carolla can be in the middle of being hilarious. Even if you’re not a fan of the comedian, you have to admit his quotes, some taken out of context, can be motivational.

1. “I didn’t have any success in show business until I was 30 to 31 years of age.”

Carolla wasn’t a child star. He didn’t get fame and fortune at an age when he didn’t know what to do with it. He worked construction after high school, and then worked even harder to break into radio. He started by calling in and doing bits for free, which led him to being a radio host on Loveline, getting his own morning show, and eventually starting his own podcasting network. Carolla worked hard for all he’s earned, and he inspires others to do the same instead of expecting the world to be handed to them on a plate.

2. “If in 1989 I said, ‘I have an idea: bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,’ they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.”

Carolla encourages ideas and innovation, that’s how he came to own his podcasting network! He doesn’t throw away an idea just because it might seem crazy to others. He trusts his judgement and follows his dreams, and it’s worth it – he comes out ahead.

3. “You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.”

Maybe I’m biased with this one, but I hate microwaving food. I don’t necessarily think the radiation’s out to get me, I just don’t like the texture and taste of food after it’s been cooked to rubber in the microwave. And I totally agree that anything cooking for six minutes in a microwave seems a little alarming to put in my body.

4. “Everything seems overwhelming when you stand back and look at the totality of it. I build a lot of stuff and it would all seem impossible if I didn’t break it down piece by piece, stage by stage. The best gift you can give yourself is some drive – that thing inside of you that gets you out the door to the gym, job interviews, and dates.”

Carolla always talks about how he got where he is today, and his advice is always to take things step by step. You can have huge goals, but don’t let them overwhelm you. Break them down into manageable tasks and tackle each one as it comes.

5. “I guess my feeling is that if you’re going to make a joke, that’s fine, but you should also sort of stand behind it, you know? A joke should be more than a joke, it should be a point that you’re trying to make.”

I think this is a really important quote, because so many comedians make obscene or off-color jokes, but as soon as there’s a backlash, they backpedal and say they didn’t mean it, or it just slipped out. I like that Carolla stands behind his jokes and statements. He never lies and denies saying anything – funny or unfunny. And it’s true that most of his remarks are taken out of context and published in ways that make him look bad, but when you go back and listen to the entire interview (or rant, as it so often is), you see that he really was making a good point.

6. “I don’t know that I appreciate things more because of how I grew up, but I am very realistic with what I expect out of people and what they expect out of me.”

Adam Carolla didn’t have the best childhood. He was incredibly poor, which has made him be practical with the money he has now. But more than that, his childhood taught him a lot about people. While his parents weren’t exactly neglectful, they just weren’t there for him. As a result, he doesn’t have unreasonable expectations of others. He isn’t overly dependent on people, even if they work for him. He does things for himself, from building a studio to filming a documentary.

7. “I get drunk, I get the ladies drunk, and I wear my sweatpants with no underpants.”

Ok, this one might be a little more “strange” than “strangely motivational,” but hold judgement and hear me out. By getting drunk and getting the ladies drunk, Carolla is having fun, being generous (assuming he’s the one buying the drinks…), and taking the initiative to change people’s attitudes. And he’s doing all of this while wearing sweatpants! With no underpants! Talk about the optimal level of comfort. I, for one, would happily accept a drink from a man with enough confidence to wear sweatpants. Providing he didn’t look totally insane. And I’d prefer to not know about the underpants… Hey, I told you this one was a stretch from the start!