20 Reasons You’re Not As Successful As You Thought You’d Be

2/24/14 10:52AM EST

20 Reasons Youre Not As Successful As You Thought Youd Be 20 Reasons Youre Not As Successful As You Thought Youd Be

Paramount Pictures/Wolf Of Wall Street

Remember when the world was your oyster and success was just around the corner, waiting with your car and your Chinese rug (that is, if you prescribe to Iggy Pop’s version of achievement)? Well, now you’re at least well on your way to 30 and that Chinese rug still isn’t going to fit in your cramped Brooklyn apartment. Here are some reasons why that may be:

1. You Thought You’d Be Really Successful

Having confidence is not the same as making assumptions. You’re problem here is that you’re doing the latter, so when life didn’t serve up a big, ole’ platter of success you were not equipped to deal with having to strive for it.

2. You Act Like You Deserve The Job You Have

…instead of the job you want. Acting can facilitate realities.

3. You Dress Like A Construction Worker

This explains why you were never trusted to do anything that people with more than a GED tend to handle.

4. You’re Doing Something You Hate

No one really tries to improve when the task they’re performing provokes tears of boredom. Try and shift into a career you enjoy and feel good about. A better work ethic should follow.

5. You’re Addicted To Social Media

Between Facebook and Snapchat, chances are you spend a lot more time checking in with virtual realities than you are with your work. Imagine your increase in productivity if all those hours lost to the Twittersphere resulted in concrete accomplishments!

6. You Still Think The “I’m Gonna Tell My Mom” Card Wins Arguments

If you still look to others to solve your interpersonal problems, then you’re simply unlucky that you weren’t born into a family of bankers with a penchant for nepotism.

7. Smoking Pot Is By Far Your Favorite Activity

This in turn makes you lazy and directs the majority of your ambition into concocting the most epic ice cream sundae to go with your hours upon hours of viewing South Park.

8. You Care More About Who You’re Dating Than Who You Are

If you’ve let your identity get too caught up in a romantic partner (or partners), chances are you might have let your personal identity slip away from you. Get it back and start asking it some serious questions.

9. You’re Too Easily Impressed By Others

Here’s a secret about everyone else who does what you can never imagine yourself accomplishing: They’re not that special. You can do all this, too, if you give it an earnest try.

10. Trying And Failing Is Scary

Sometimes the consequences of an earnest try will seem to bite you in the ass. But trying and failing is better than not trying at all (apologies for the cliché), and you’ll at least learn from your mistakes.

11. You Listen Too Strictly To Your Parents

Still stuck in that career mom picked out for you? Or maybe you’re haunted by her words that your current line of work would never get you anywhere? Let go of what mom thinks and listen to yourself for a change. C’mon, you’re an adult!

12. Your Idea Of A “Goal” Is Getting To Work On Time

Maybe try for something a little bit further reaching… Like a promotion, or a project that falls outside the box of what you normally do.

13. You Party Too Hard

If everyday is marked by the viciousness level of your hangover, chances are the pounding headaches and foggy judgment are getting in your way of career ascension.

14. You Focus More on Buddying Up To Your Coworkers Than Your Boss

It’s great to have friends at work, but you’ve got to remember that underneath the camaraderie and inside jokes about your boss’s bad haircut, they’re striving for the same promotions as you are.

15. You’re At The Beck And Call Of Others

You let people push you around and no longer know what it feels like to be your own boss. Try saying no to the next coworker who begs you to help take on some of his work and finish a project of yours a week early instead.

16. “You’re Not Attractive Enough”

Or smart enough, or didn’t go to a fancy enough college, etc., etc. Making these sorts of excuses will get you nothing but self-pity.

17. You’re Unable To Laugh At Yourself

Without handling embarrassment well, you’re stuck with the play-it-safe method, which will leave you at a steady mediocre career-wise.

18. You Have An Undiagnosed Psychological Disorder

Panic attacks preventing you from public speaking? Maybe the problem is more serious than the jitters.

19. You Got A Girl Pregnant When You Were In High School

Having to bring new life into the world as a teenager could definitely put your personal dreams on hold for a bit (unless they were only to become a parent at an early age).

20. You’re Shy

Being meek and modest may work once you’ve already gained success, but before that, you’ve got to make your voice heard. How else can you communicate your burning ambition?


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