13 Signs You’re In Your 20s
It happens to everyone eventually: the shock and mild confusion that indicate you’re firmly in your 20s and will only continue to get older, eventually reaching your 30s — an even more perplexing and scary concept. The symptoms of being in your 20s can be difficult to discern, but here are a few signs that indicate you’ve reached the beginning of adulthood and can be as cranky as you want.
1. You Hate More Things on the Internet Than You Like
Every new thing seems weird and annoying to you. You know the sites that you like and have no problem being curmudgeonly about it.
2. Your Body Cracks In Interesting New Places
When your hips or knees start making odd popping noises like bubble wrap being loudly popped, you wonder whether it’s normal and if so, what other surprises your joints have in store for you during the next few decades.
3. You Have Some Money In the Bank
Not a lot, but some.
4. You Look Forward to Sleeping on the Weekends
It’s not that you don’t do fun things; it’s just that you sometimes look forward to getting them over with so you can get a really good night’s sleep on Saturday.
5. The Most-Played Songs On Your Phone Are From Like Six Years Ago
This music collection was on the cutting edge of 2008! Nothing will ever be as good. Nothing!
6. You Increasingly Dislike Loud Noises and Crowds…
… also standing up. Anything that involves standing around a crowded bar/room/street/anywhere while people mill around, yell and spill things on you is not a fun prospect.
7. You Can Look Back On the Past Few Years And Not Feel Embarrassed
There will, of course, still be some moments that make you want to cringe, but it’s not nearly as bad as it used to be. Either you’ve finally figured out how to navigate through life without being 100 percent awkward or you no longer care — either way, it’s like sweet release from the icy claws of anxiety.
8. You May or May Not Be Planning Your Future Kids’ College Funds
Even if you’re not sure if or when you’re going to have these kids, how many there will be and what their names are, you’ve begun casually investigating the 529 plan and other college savings accounts, because it’s a harsh world out there and these hypothetical kids need a good education.
9. You Have Fewer Friends and That Doesn’t Bother You
Maybe you’ve lost touch with some people, but in the age of the Internet, you never really lose touch — plus meeting new people sucks and you don’t want to invest that much effort in finding new friends.
10. It’s Really Depressing How Long Ago You Studied Abroad
One of the greatest adventures of your life was… ugh, five years ago? Almost six? Every time you think about it, you get a panicky urge to plan another trip to France or Spain or South America before it’s too late, and then you realize how much money that would cost.
11. You Have a 401(k)
You know you need it, but you still curse the day you agreed to deposit 15 percent of your paycheck into this thing.
12. Your Career Is Going Nowhere…
… or at least it feels that way. Then you realize that you’re in your 20s and you’re not supposed to be successful yet, so you can postpone that anxiety until you’re in your 30s, at which point it is acceptable to begin panicking and wildly flailing through personal and professional crises of every category on a weekly basis.
13. You Like to Complain About Younger People
Few things are more delightful than transitioning from being complained about to being the complainer. Don’t like any of the new songs you’ve heard recently? Hate current fashion trends? Don’t bottle it up — tell those kids to get off your figurative lawn and never look back. You’ve earned it!