Men always obsess over the “secret code” women use to communicate with them. Soaring way above their heads and leaving them pacing circularly in confusion, this alleged “code” is actually much easier for guys to understand than they may realize. If you read the following examples, you’ll be able to better connect the dots between what she says and what she means:

She says: “I’ll be out with friends tonight; call me and maybe we’ll meet up.”

She means: If I don’t find anyone else to sleep with tonight, I’ll sleep with you.

She says: “It’s OK.” [When you can’t get it up.]

She means: Well, that sucks. I’ll be in the bathroom with my vibrator.

She says: “Do you want to go to that party? I mean if you don’t, that’s OK…”

She means: We’re going to that party, or else I’ll make you feel very guilty, Mister.

She says: “Fine.”

She means: You’re not even worth arguing with right now because you’re acting too stupid.

She says: “Whatever.”

She means: You’re dismissed.

She says: “What are you doing tonight?”

She means: We’re hanging out later, right?

She says: “That is such an insult.”

She means: I would like a proper compliment from you now. Thank you.

She says: “I’ll think about it.”

She means: You’re kind of winning right now, but I’m still going to make you sweat this one out.

She says: “Me?! I would never do that!”

She means: Pshh, I do that shit all the time. Awkward.

She says: “That guy Arnold keeps calling me.”

She means: Other dudes want me, too. Step up your game.

She says: “Are you even paying attention?”

She means: Pay attention. Now.

She says: “I can never tell what you’re thinking.”

She means: Please be more explicit about your feelings. Or at least talk to me; I’m bored.

She says: “Oh, you’re going to sleep? I thought maybe you’d stay up later.”

She means: Uh, we’re not having sex tonight? News to me!

She says: “What’s your favorite movie?”

She means: I’m going to judge you on this, so please don’t try and impress me by saying “Titantic.”