According to a survey conducted by Liberty Mutual Holding Co., an astounding 34 percent of teenagers who admit to having driven while stoned actually believe marijuana improves their driving skills. Seriously? I don’t know what kind of chronic those kids are smoking, but that shit doesn’t help your driving. It might make you so paranoid you slow down to about 30 miles per hour but think your speeding, but those ain’t mad skills.

In the same survey, 41 percent of teens said pot had no effect on their driving, while 62 percent of those who had driven under the influence of alcohol said drinking negatively impacted their driving. According to Liberty Mutual and Students Against Destructive Decisions—which assisted in the study—parents need to buck up when it comes to educating kids about safe driving habits. A whopping 23 percent of ten teens have actually driven while under the influence of alcohol, marijuana or illegal prescription drugs. What the hell? Not only is that way too many using the illegal substances, but they’re actually out on the road while doing so? That’s a bunch of bull shit right there. Where the hell are the parents?

Meanwhile, the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws (NORML) agrees that stoned drivers may slow down and have slower response times, but the link between car accidents and marijuana use is less clear than that associated with drinking and driving.

“This reaction is just the opposite of that exhibited by drivers under the influence of alcohol, who tend to drive in a more risky manner proportional to their intoxication,” NORML said on its Web site, although it advises marijuana users not to drive after smoking weed.

Teens, on the other hand, don’t see a difference. A whopping 86 percent of the 1,708 high school juniors and seniors Liberty Mutual surveyed said driving stoned is no different than driving drunk. But can their perception even be trusted? After all, three-quarters of them said talking a phone while driving is at least as distracting as driving under the influence of drugs and alcohol. Apparently, they’re picking up some parental warnings. Maybe it’s time Mom and Dad start focusing on other dangers, as well.

“I think parents are fooling themselves,” said Dave Melton, managing director of global road safety for Liberty Mutual. “In some cases, parents are thinking of their own teen years and not realizing that things have changed drastically since then.“